Millennials are Apparently Killing the Beer Industry and I’m Appalled

So basically this article says that millennials aren’t drinking as much alcohol as previous generations, and that a lot of the ones who do drink prefer wine and liquor over beer. There were a lot of numbers in there that didn’t really make sense to me so I’m not gonna bore you with them. We here at BTB Sports aim to inform and entertain readers instead of tossing a bunch of meaningless/probably significant if you took the time to interpret them statistics at them.

Honestly, this headline kind of surprised the shit out of me. Believe it or not, I don’t think myself and my fellow students at Rutgers, the State University of New Jersey, have anything to do with millennials consuming less beer. I’d probably wager that we do the most to keep millennial beer consumption right where it should be. It is for this reason that I am disappointed in the millennials who are contributing to the downfalls of the beer industry. It is downright selfish of them to not be cracking any cold ones with the boys. If you crack a beer in the forest, and no boys are there to hear it, was it even a cold one? These loser millennials apparently wouldn’t even know.

Bottom line, millennials get blamed by older people for a lot of shit, and most of it is out of our control. We get blamed for being on our phones too much, not getting married, and even endangering casual restaurants like Buffalo Wild Wings. But I’ll be damned if we get blamed for killing the beer industry. So millennials, join me in doing what’s best for America and crack a cold one with the boys. It’s what George Washington would’ve wanted.

P.S. – Can’t wait to be drinking some cold ones with the boys at BWW one day, not looking at my phone to ignore a text from my wife and then think “wow they were wrong about literally all that stuff they said about millennials” (also sorry to my future wife for ignoring your text it was just for the sake of the joke)

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