What About the Children?!

If you were to ask me who the biggest jerk in the new SunTrust park has been this season my mind jumps to Jose Batista who christened the new Braves home with an obnoxious batflip.


HOWEVER, I would be wrong. This past week the most absurd case of terrible PR hit the  Braves in the following video…


First of all, this screams Paul Blart spinoff… instead of saving the malls of America from terror, he saves the stadiums of America from evil parents trying to get a ball for their children.

Second, how about we get that man a contract to pinch run for some team with not too much depth. My mans sprint to that kid was fast enough to tag up on a medium deep flyball hit to left. Nice athleticism, but how about we use that on saving someone from a line drive foul ball coming into your section, or tackling a rouge streaker?

Clearly, what ticked people off was not the Guard forcing the fan who reached on the field to leave. That’s typical procedure. Taking the ball from the 6 year old… Extra. Luckily, the Braves management (who were probably cringing as they watched an employee rip the ball out of a child’s hands and throw the kids father out of the stadium) did the best they could by giving Sparky a team signed ball and hooking pops up with some tickets to a future game. Good save for the Braves. I mean in the Dad’s eyes he probably bought the tickets for that section in hopes of a souvenir knowing that is the only fence the Braves can hit the ball over. Also, props to the man for handling his ejection so well. If we could all keep our cool like he did would there ever be war? The dude takes his glove off, gives it to his wife, and leaves peacefully even though he was dealing with Agent Try-Hard.

Relax Sun Trust mall cop. You have officially completed the security guard equivalent of brown-nosing a coach. You probably didn’t let anyone in your section even though the stadium was no more than 20% full. You take your job way too seriously, and you know damn well there was no threat to anything or person you are in charge of securing. Take L’s Braves Security… take L’s.

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